The other day I was in one of my favorite stores, beginning my Christmas shopping, when I overheard this conversation: “That would look great in your mom’s family room. You should buy it for her.”

“Oh, it would…and look, it’s on sale…but, it would just be one more useless thing to collect dust.”

Good for her! It takes fortitude to resist temptation to buy more “stuff” – especially when it is on sale just in time for Christmas! Unfortunately, the homes of many care recepients are filled to overflowing with charming but superfluous items – many of which were bestowed with love by well-meaning friends and family members.

Several months ago I visited in a dear older couple’s home and could barely find a path from the front door to the living room. Being surrounded by stacks of boxes, newspapers, collections and miscellaneous knick-knacks – all covered with a thick layer of dust – instigated a sneezing attack that sent dust bunnies soaring through the air. (I admit to having a robust sneeze; if I am in aisle four at Wal-Mart when a sneeze overcomes me, inevitably shoppers on aisles one through seven respond with resounding, “gesundheits.”)

“Oh, are you getting a cold?” the husband (who serves as his wife’s caregiver) asked, seemingly oblivious to the clutter and dust.

Which leads me to today’s topic: appropriate Christmas gifts for care recipients. Of course we want to remember our elderly and sick loved ones at Christmas; but our gifts should be enjoyed, not unneeded items that will only serve as dust magnets.

It is always a good idea to ask the caregiver for gift suggestions. Caregivers should make a habit of jotting down desired items throughout the year, so a ready list is available come December. Consumable items – such as clothing, toiletries, and gifts of food – are almost always appreciated. So are simple devices that provide convenience and self-reliance such as grabbers and back-scratchers.

While I like the idea of presenting wrapped gifts – which spark joy and invoke memories – you may also want to think outside the box. Place a gift card to a grocery store or pharmacy in a medium sized box and wrap it festively. As an added treat, pop in several pieces of wrapped Christmas candy.

Gifts of service can be especially meaningful to both the care receiver and the caregiver. This category is broad and can include “handyman” chores such as repairing a leaky faucet, replacing batteries in smoke alarms, installing furnace filters, or issuing coupons for snow shoveling in case Old Man Winter decides to send some of the frozen white stuff our way.

Giving of self and time is another potential gift that will be well received. Make a commitment to spend an hour each week participating in an appropriate activity such as reading, playing checkers, or putting together a puzzle. Giving an in-home manicure and pedicure or a hand or foot massage is considered by most to be a pleasant and welcome indulgence. If your loved one is able, taking him out to eat occasionally would be a special treat, while also providing a break for the caregiver.

When you make your list this Christmas, be sure to include those family members and friends who are no longer able to fully care for themselves. Be creative. Instead of objects that will only collect dust, give presents that are useful and provide pleasure.

With a little ingenuity and a lot of love, we can give Christmas gifts that will be perfectly suited for those special elderly folk in our lives.

Caring Quote:The best gifts are not things. – unknown