I want to share a few ideas about taking occasional breaks from caregiving. It is imperative that you set aside some time to be free from your responsibilities so you can relax and rejuvenate.

Imagine being employed in a job in which you never have any time off – twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. Many times that is a caregiver’s schedule. At a minimum, a full-time caregiver needs thirty minutes every day that he can call his own; an entire evening once a week; and at least one weekend off each month. Unfortunately, these are usually not included in the job description, which more often than not is unwritten and assumes you will be there whenever needed. And you will be – as long as you do not wear yourself out by refusing to recognize your need for respite.

Let’s start with one hour every day. You may be able to get up an hour earlier than your receiver and savor your first cup of morning coffee in solitude in your favorite space, accompanied only by inspirational reading material and your favorite music. You may prefer an activity – such as an exercise routine or mental challenge – in the afternoon when your loved one is taking a nap. Some people prefer to wind down just before bedtime with a good book. Or soak in the tub. Therein lies the key: choose the time and the type of activity – or inactivity – that nourishes your spirit. Caregivers have various interests and needs and you should concentrate on what will inspire you. Give yourself these sixty minutes (or divide it into two thirty-minute interludes) to look forward to every day and write it on your schedule using permanent marker.

An entire evening once a week may seem like an impossible dream for some caregivers, but you need to look at all possible options. Unless you and your loved one are the only members of your extended family, there should be someone who can take your place several hours each week. If there are no available family members, other options include neighbors, friends, fellow churchgoers or hired sitters. This will give you the opportunity to join a support group, enjoy a meal out, or go shopping – just choose something you want to do and not a “chore.”

You will want to turn to the same sources to find someone who can take over for you one full day (24 hours) – or dream big – one entire weekend each month. These longer periods will make it possible for you to get together with friends, attend church, participate in recreational activities or pamper yourself (think hair salon, mani/pedi or massage). Yes, you deserve it, but more significantly, in the long run, both you and your loved one will reap the benefits.

Don’t forget to make plans for an annual vacation. It needn’t be an exotic or extended trip, but it should give you something to look forward to and pleasant memories to bring back home.

 While all caregivers need time off, some of the above guidelines may not apply when your receiver is also your spouse. You may have no desire to spend a weekend away from home (or you may, especially if your duties are preventing you from having quality time with other family members), but you still need to set aside time to take care of your own physical, emotional and spiritual needs.

If you are not a caregiver, but have family members or friends who are, please consider offering your time and assistance so they can have these greatly needed breaks from their tremendous responsibilities. They will be blessed and so will you.

Caring Quote: Fatigue is the common enemy of us all – so slow down, rest up, replenish and refill.” – Jeffery R. Holland