Caregiver to Caregiver

Several weeks ago, Randy asked me if I had seen his “black water bottle.” I wasn’t even aware he had one, though I have noticed a stockpile of various gadgets he has been accumulating over the past few years. He described the bottle as having a fabric cover and carrying strap so he can easily take it along on his morning walks. I suggested that he look on his shelf in the hall closet but got busy and did not follow up.

A few days later a small package was on our front porch when I came home from the grocery store. It was addressed to Randy – and inside was a black water bottle with a fabric cover and strap. Obviously not the one he had been looking for, but a new one to replace the one he had misplaced. He began taking it with him on his daily walks.

Let me give you a little background. We live in my parents’ former house. It is almost one hundred years old, but as they say on HGTV, “It has good bones.” For an old house, I have always been impressed with the spacious closets. There is an entry closet in the foyer as well as two nice-sized storage closets in the hallway – one at the foot of the stairs and one under the stairs. I have designated the one under the stairs as the linen closet. The frequently used vacuum cleaner has a home there as well as back-ups of toilet paper, hand sanitizer etc. and an abundant supply of band-aids. At least several times each week, a grandkid will run in to ask for one.

The contents of the other hall closet are more miscellaneous: high school yearbooks (they almost got the boot during my last purge of stuff…but alas I caved); boxes of old photos; travel maps. I think I am the only person who still uses them but I have always enjoyed being the navigator on our trips – instead of “that other woman” who sometimes gets us hopelessly lost and never finds out-of-the-way but endearing surprises such as a ferry to cross a river instead of just a plain old bridge. 

On the floor and bottom shelf are half-empty cans of paint – labeled of course – and a plastic box of stirrers, openers, brushes and other paint supplies. And, oh, my plastic sheet cake storage box which I pull our every October to transport a chocolate sheet cake to the Zachary reunion. In addition, both Randy and I each have our own “personal” shelf where no questions are asked. On mine, there are mostly craft supplies, my own tool set stored neatly in a lavender case, and a few knick-knacks that are not currently on display. Randy’s shelf, on the other hand…let’s see: the various new-fangled specialized appliances along with their accessories that he sees advertised, buys and uses once or twice before relegating them to the closet if no one else in the family will take it; an overflow of some of his favorite big-box-store purchases such as zip lock bags – every size available (on the other hand, I never have to worry about running out of baggies); tools he uses to make minor repairs around the house; and assorted electronics or the boxes they came in (just in case he ever has to return them). 

This morning, I was looking for some green craft paint – to touch up a hummingbird figurine I display on the screen porch – and since my shelf is orderly, I found it right away. Alas, I made the mistake of gazing at Randy’s shelf a bit too long and before I knew it, I was executing a little tidying. (That really is a good verb to describe what happens when the decluttering bug hits me.) 

Three boxes of gallon size baggies looked as if they had just been tossed in, no rhyme or reason to it. I took them out so I could restock them neatly, and what did I find but two hammers…in addition to the one hammer I had already noticed lying on top of a pile of screw drivers and wrenches. I think he’s been looking for at least one of those hammers. As I deftly stacked the boxes of baggies, I heard a crackling sound. Just then the motion light Randy installed over his shelf clicked off, but I stuck my hand in anyway. I pulled out a never-opened cellophane bag with a, “Warning – Risk of Suffocation” notice. I treaded carefully but my concern escalated when I observed the “made in China” label. Through the clear package, I could see three round plastic rings of some sort – each about eight-inches in diameter. I have no clue and am waiting expectantly for Randy to get home so I can ask him about these…things. Inside the yet-to-be open package, I spied a note card with “Thank you” written on the front. Without opening the package but manipulating it slightly, I could read two words inside: “Sincerely, Jess.”  Hmm…

Another never-opened clear plastic bag contained something that looked like cheesecloth and included an instruction card with the words, “filtration/utilization du sac a lait de noix” – oh, that’s in Spanish. Flipping it over, I read “filtration/nut milk bag usage.” No clue on this either. I was just about to close the door and paint my hummingbird, when, moving my head slightly to the left, I saw something in the corner. Black. Cylinder shaped. Looked like fabric. I reached for it. What do you know – the missing black water bottle! Now my sweetie has two matching ones. I put it on the kitchen island so he will see it when he gets home. I can just see and hear him now: Staring puzzlingly, he will declare, “That’s not where I left my water bottle this morning.”

Sometimes, I just have to tease Randy because we are so totally opposite when it comes to being organized. But lest you think I do it without his knowledge, he posts these blogs for me every week, because I am technically challenged and that is one of many areas in which he excels. 

I admit it – this blog does not have a caregiving focus – or does it?  

Sometimes, caregivers need to take a break from regular duties and enjoy some laughter – or at least a big smile. So, I hope you have enjoyed this true tale of a couple who have completely opposite mindsets of what it means to secure and store stuff.

In addition, organizing and decluttering your surroundings will also make your duties as a caregiver easier. There are seven columns in the archives that deal with this subject. If you are interested in pursuing more calming and peaceful surroundings in your home – for you, your care recipient and your entire family (not to mention visitors) – I encourage you to check them out. You may find ideas to inspire you to get started on your own reorganization project as well as helpful hints to help you “execute”your plan. Just go to the archives and choose the topic “clutter.”

Caring Question: Think about how you feel when you enter a home that is cluttered, messy, smelly – even dirty; now consider walking through the doors of a home that is orderly, well-kept, fresh – not necessarily immaculate, but tidy. In which would you rather visit? In which of these environments would you choose to live?