Caregiver to Caregiver

Every other Saturday night, we invite our grandchildren over for “Grammy’s Bed and Breakfast.” I love this opportunity to spend quality time with the grandkids, watch them interact with their beloved “cuzzies,” and observe their personal development. I think grandchildren grow up even faster than children!

Randy and I have discovered that when we plan activities for the evening, we can keep the chaos at a controlled level. Last week’s schedule went something like this: free play for the first 20 minutes; 30 minutes of exercise led by Talise, our oldest granddaughter who is destined to be a gymnastics coach/ballet instructor/teacher; a spirited “egg toss” using fabric eggs fashioned long ago by my mom for her grandkids; healthy snack; baths and pajamas for the little ones; cuddling on and around the sofa for a kids’ Easter movie.  By the time moms and dads arrived to fetch the younger ones home, several were already asleep. Then Papa goes to bed and Grammy has a cup of tea and reads the newspaper.

We have learned that the key to a successful evening is to plan ahead. The same is true for caregivers. Activities refer to all the things we do, from “activities of daily living” (grooming, dressing, eating, and chores) to reading, playing games, exercising, and attending special events. Our activities represent our personalities and interests. They should produce pleasure and purpose. When family and friends are involved, a sense of normalcy occurs. Many people who require the assistance of a caregiver can still enjoy some of their former favorite activities. However, they may not be able to plan. That’s where the organizational skills of a caregiver come in. (Don’t say you don’t have organizational skills; if you didn’t you wouldn’t be a caregiver.)

Activities provide stimulation and can greatly improve quality of life and behavior.  Think about it: if you sat in a chair all day watching reruns, you may begin to feel agitated about the time the sun goes down. However, if you have been actively involved in a variety of interesting and enjoyable activities during the day, when it’s bedtime, you are ready to rest.

We all understand that as caregivers we can’t also be full-time activity directors; but planning meaningful activities is advantageous for our loved ones and us. A good place to start is drafting a flexible daily schedule. You could set aside an hour on Monday morning to look at or read favorite books. Monday afternoon could include tea and cookies (or coffee and pie) while you put together a puzzle. After dinner, a walk or wheelchair ride around the neighborhood may be appropriate. Taking the time to plan ahead prevents you from wasting time and energy later trying to think of something to do.  It also allows you to include those activities you know your loved one will enjoy and that will utilize his/her talents. Choose ones that incorporate different skills: mental, physical, social, and creative.

If you can’t think of anything to do, call me. I’ll send some of the grandkids over.