Missing!
Three words that strike certain fear in a caregiver’s heart are “Grandpa is missing.” Previously I told you about Silver Alert, aprogram designed to quickly circulate identifying information when an adult with dementia or other cognitive impairment goes missing. Today we will discuss what to do in the event your loved one goes missing, but first just a few thoughts about prevention.
Caring for a loved one with dementia – at any stage – entails that you provide adequate supervision. Even one episode of wandering away from home necessitates that supervision be constant. In the same way that you would not leave a young child home alone, it is unwise and could have dire consequences to leave an elderly person with dementia alone. After my father’s first (and only) episode of wandering outdoors at night (during a downpour) Randy installed bolt locks at the top of the exit doors. This worked well for us. An alarm system is another option. Always store car keys in an inaccessible place.
Even with safety measures in place, statistics reveal that a person with dementia may still wander, so it is best to be prepared. Here’s what you should do now.
- Provide an identification bracelet that cannot be easily removed. Include name, medical condition(s) and two emergency contact phone numbers, preferably engraved on the inside of the bracelet.
- Keep a good quality, recent photo of your loved available along with a thorough physical description: name, age, height, weight, color of hair and eyes, and any identifying marks such as moles and scars. List medical conditions, allergies and current medications. Having this in written form and ready to hand to a first responder will be much easier than trying to compile this information on the spur of the moment once you discover your loved one is missing.
- If there is any possibility your receiver could leave in a vehicle, include the description and license number with the above personal details.
- Each day, make a mental or written note of the clothes your loved one is wearing; be as specific as possible.
After putting preventive measures in place and being prepared just in case, try not to worry about the possibility of your loved one wandering away. But sometimes the unthinkable happens. If you believe your loved one is missing, do not hesitate to call 911. Right away, inform them of age and medical condition. They will ask for the identifying information you already have written down, as well as what the person was wearing and the time and place the person was last seen. Provide any details you think may help, such as previous violent episodes.
A “be on the lookout” bulletin to all appropriate law enforcement agencies will be activated. An investigation will begin immediately and local law enforcement will determine if the criteria warrant a request for a Silver Alert. The Center for Missing Persons will be notified and the alert activated.
When a missing loved one is found and returned home, try to avoid a confrontation. Instead, provide reassurance. The experience was certainly terrifying for him/her as well.