Caregiver to Caregiver

Caregivers are, of course, the best source for great ideas that serve to improve the caregiving experience. When they write me or I have the opportunity to talk with them, I am impressed at the knowledge they have acquired on their journey. I keep a list of suggestions they share. Here are some in the form of a true/false quiz so you can exercise your brain. Answers follow. Enjoy and learn.

True/False Questions:

1. Mirrors should be placed throughout the house so loved ones can frequently check their appearance.
2. Most seniors prefer to tell time using traditional three-hand clocks.
3. Allow your loved ones to make their own decisions as much as possible.
4. It is best not to laugh in the presence of those with dementia.
5. If there are children in the household, inform and involve them as much as possible.
6. Make a master list of daily caregiving tasks, listed according to importance.
7. If you have assumed the responsibility of primary caregiver, there is no need to hold meetings with extended family.
8. Always put your loved one’s needs first.

Answers:

1. False. The reflection from mirrors may startle or cause confusion, especially with dementia. It is best to limit their use to appropriate places such as the bathroom.
2. False. Even though they grew up telling time by the position of the hands on the clock, they may now find this frustrating. Digital clocks are easier to read.
3. True. Being able to make decisions (such as what clothes to wear or what to eat) helps to maintain independence and a feeling of control. The secret is to limit options before they are presented (Do you want to wear the blue or red sweater? Would you prefer chicken or fish for dinner?) to lessen confusion and prevent them from feeling overwhelmed.
4. False. Humor is a gift to be enjoyed. Just follow the old adage we all learned as children: laugh “with” and not “at” the other person.
5. True – a resounding true! Children can learn basic life skills as well as important character qualities such as compassion and patience from living in a home where care is provided to an elderly or disabled family member. The recipient will also benefit from the joy and vitality a child provides.
6. True. Although we never know what tomorrow may bring, keeping a master list of must-dos will help you prioritize as well as recruit others to assist you. Checking off items on a list also reminds you of how much you have accomplished.
7. False. For everyone’s best interest, keep all family members informed and welcome their input. This not only helps to maintain family harmony, but also will make it easier for you to ask for and receive assistance when needed.
8. False. If you answered “true” you must be a new reader. Experienced caregivers (and the experts in this field) understand this principle. Before the plane takes off, the flight attendant instructs that in case of an emergency, put your own oxygen mask on first, before helping someone else. Remember, you must take care of yourself so will be physically, mentally and spiritually able to care for your loved one. This is not being selfish; it is being responsible.

How well did you do? Some of these ideas may have been new to you; others you have heard many times before. Caregivers are always open to good advice because they want to excel in their role. Take a few minutes to list your best caregiving ideas and share them with others.