Caregiver to Caregiver

Yesterday, I finally ventured to Wal-mart. I had heard the accounts from others braver than I. Empty shelves. Long lines. Bickering customers. No parking spaces. 

Right away, I saw and pulled into a parking space that was rather close to the grocery-side entrance. It was late afternoon and there were no lines of people waiting to get in. So far, so good. My granddaughter Geilia was with me and both of us graciously practiced social distancing. My first stop was in the women’s feminine hygiene section. For years I could skip that department; then the bladder muscles started aging, and well, a little protection is better than a big puddle, if you know what I mean. I snatched the last package.

On to the groceries where most of the things I was seeking (sugar, Clorox, fat-free hotdogs) were not available. I did discover a few items that are usually hard to find (vegetarian baked beans and cans of sliced pineapple in its own juice). Overall it was depressing; I am making every attempt not to fall into that trap so I hurried along. Of course, there were tons of every kind of Easter candy imaginable. I bought Geilia a bag of pastel M & M’s for helping me with my shopping (I enjoy the company) and a dollar package of chocolate-covered marshmallow eggs for my daughter Amy who proofreads this blog for me every week. Sorry Amy – I guess they won’t be a surprise!

When our world started changing a couple of weeks ago, I decided not to write about Coronavirus because everyone else was. Now I am writing this on March 24, my daughter Emily’s 32^nd birthday. Her sisters and I threw an impromptu tea party this afternoon – sugar cookies, hot tea and milk for the children – to help cheer her up. She’s a little disappointed that there will be no nice dinner out with her husband, due to the current state of affairs in our nation. But last night he surprised her with decadent slices of three different layer cakes from her favorite cake shop. And tonight he’s bringing home pizza from her second-favorite Italian restaurant; the first favorite is closed. Still, not too bad for a birthday celebration in the midst of a worldwide crisis. 

Things could be so much worse; but I hear that many people are falling into despair as they deal with the restrictions, inconveniences, and the lack of social contact. It is certainly a way of life most Americans have never experienced. So I decided to address the current issue but with a positive attitude and some hopefully helpful ideas for caregivers.

I remain flummoxed concerning the run on toilet paper. When I heard that was the first product to be wiped clean from store shelves (yes, yes, pun intended), I was puzzled. It’s not as if toilet paper protects you from viruses or, in reality, is even necessary. About seventy-five percent of the world’s population does not have toilet paper. When we visit India, we take our own; even if we are fortunate enough to find a western style toilet there, it is a no-no to put used tissue in the toilet (in goes into a sealed bag for later disposal). Indians use their left hand to splash water; just a step down from European bidets. So really, folks, we could get along without toilet paper if we had to. I mentioned to my husband that he has enough old T-shirts that could be cut into squares, used and properly disposed of to last us at least a few years.

See – for just a moment – you didn’t think about the Big C – the Coronavirus. Please do not think I am making light. It is very serious; but we must go on with our lives. And a distraction now and then is good.

As a caregiver, taking care of your loved one can be even more challenging during this season. You want to make sure they are not exposed to anyone who may have the virus. That probably means few or no visitors for a while. Doctors’ visits or even planned medical procedures may have to be rescheduled. This will require extra patience and a willingness to be flexible. 

Since it may just be the two of you – giver and recipient – stuck at home for some time – remember that sheltering in place does not have to mean seclusion. We may not be able to touch and hug just now, but we can stay in touch with family members and friends by phone, email or your favorite communication option. If you have a front porch, take advantage of the spring weather and sit out in the fresh air for your morning coffee. You may even have a chance to wave to a neighbor or shout out a cheery greeting. If your loved one is able, do take her with you. Make yourselves comfortable and sit a spell. Return in the evening to enjoy God’s vast watercolor painting as the sun sets.

If you are not able to go outside, push those heavy drapes wide open and raise the blinds. With cooperative weather, you can open the windows and watch the curtains dance in the breeze. Turn up some soothing music. Take that book you’ve been meaning to read forever off the shelf and read it out loud for the two of you to enjoy.

Instead of listening to the news hour after hour, find a Christian radio station that presents a range of music and ministry options. My favorite is Bible Broadcasting Network, which you can also access online. My dad loved this station and since I rediscovered it several years ago it has become the soundtrack for my daily activities. BBN provides Christian music – probably the most extensive collection of traditional Christian music I have ever found in one place; devotionals, drama, Bible teaching, prayer and even news which is concise, and on the hour, most hours. World and national news is always followed with “good news” – the reading of scripture. You can even listen to Alexander Scourby read the entire Bible through in a year. This past week the announcers have been sharing encouraging and comforting comments in addition to the regular programming. I cannot recommend this station to caregivers enough; you and your recipient will be blessed, and it is so much better than watching the pitiful offerings of most television channels; not to mention constant pessimistic news. (And this is from a life-long news-junkie.)

When and how this pandemic will end is in God’s hands. I trust Him. I pray you do too.

Caring Quote: Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7