Five Wishes
Five Wishes is now considered America’s most popular living will. The mission of Aging with Dignity, the non-profit organization that introduced this concept in 1997, is to affirm and safeguard the human dignity of individuals as they age and to promote better care at end of life. The founder, Jim Towey, was a friend and co-worker of Mother Theresa and credits her as his inspiration.
The document has been called “the living will with a heart and soul” because it addresses a person’s medical, emotional and spiritual needs. Once signed, the first two wishes become legal advance directives in 42 states. The other three wishes speak to personal, spiritual and emotional wishes. They are not legally binding, but let your loved ones know exactly how you want to be treated. Here’s a synopsis:
Wish 1: The Person I Want to Make Care Decisions for Me When I Can’t Make Them for Myself. This person will become your Health Care Agent when your attending doctor finds you are no longer able to speak for yourself.
Wish 2: My Wish for the Kind of Medical Treatment I Want or Don’t Want. This is a living will – a definition of what life support treatment means to you and what measures you do and do not want to be taken. Included in this section is the statement, “I believe life is precious and that I deserve to be treated with dignity.”
Wish 3: My Wish for How Comfortable I Want To Be. In this section you have the opportunity to consider and make choices regarding comfort care – from what type of pain management you prefer to personal grooming and bathing instructions. You can even describe the kind of music you want to listen to and request that massages be included in your plan of care.
Wish 4: My Wish for How I Want People to Treat Me. Options include where you want to be (home, hospice etc.); if you want people close by, touching and talking to you; and if you desire your pastor and others to pray with you.
Wish 5: My Wish for What I Want My Loved Ones to Know. This contains expressions of your love for family and friends; assurance that you are not afraid because you believe “death is not the end but a new beginning”; matters of forgiveness; how you want to be remembered; and personal wishes regarding funeral and memorial plans.
Caring Quote: “Happy is the person who knows what to remember of the past, what to enjoy in the present, and what to plan for in the future.” – Arnold H. Glascow